Are you stuck in a rut and it’s time to make some changes?

by | Aug 13, 2019 | Emotional Intelligence, Leadership, Mental Resilience

This month I want to talk about transitions as it’s coming up both in my life and with those around me. There seems to be this point, in everyone’s lives that we get stuck in a rut and no amount of thinking, strategizing and doing can get us out of it.

As Albert Einstein most famously said about the definition of insanity “it’s doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results…”

So, if you have found yourself (as I have at points), dreaming of a simpler life, a different career or a significant life event to shake things up then you would not be alone. So, what I wanted to share with you today is a radically different way of approaching significant change in your life.

When we get stuck operating in ‘masculine’ mode

As successful businessmen and women, we are used to making stuff happen, getting shit done and acting. So, we often apply this same model to creating significant change and initially, it seems to create some traction. This is the domain of masculine energy and it allows us to build things and work towards achieving our goals. But, if we spend all of our time in this mode, we can get stuck in the business of ‘doing’, get worn down by the daily grind and, lose sight of ourselves and what we are aiming for.

Does any of this sound familiar?

We need to learn in these moments when to stop pushing and take a step back to allow new inspiration, ideas and fresh energy to flow in. This often means we have to just ‘be’ with ourselves in a space of pause and reflection. A space where we allow our energies to regroup and restore.

In today’s fast-paced world this can often feel very unfamiliar and even counterproductive. But think about it…if we want to get some new results that we have never had before we have to start doing things differently.

Understanding the difference between masculine and feminine energy

So, where does this source of ‘new results’ or creativity lie? It’s actually in our feminine energy… I was 1st introduced to the concept of masculine and feminine energy by Tony Robbins many years ago and the good news is, we all have the power to access both energies, regardless of gender. This concept was brought back front and centre by a phenomenal experience I had in a recent business boot camp hosted by a dear friend and amazing human Lorraine Murphy who brought the wonderful intuit that is Helen Jacobs into the room. What she shared was instrumental to me making some significant changes for the better, so I feel compelled to share with you all.

Helen talked about a different way to view new projects that are coming up in business or life. That before we can get ‘busy’ in the building of them they actually need to be birthed into physical form…This ‘birthing’ sits in the feminine or the ‘mother’ energy and she drew parallels to the cyclical nature of this energy. It works in seasons and there is a time to sow new seeds and allow them to bloom and ultimately, harvest. There is also a time to prune, weed and allow certain plants to die off through winter.  Then she said something very profound…

The feminine creates and the masculine builds.

And then it hit me like a ton of bricks how can we expect to truly create change and allow new things to form if we don’t create the space and time for this? So, for anyone that is pushing and strategizing to create change but you don’t feel like you are getting anywhere, it could be time to take a different tack. Especially as we are still in winter in the southern hemisphere. It’s still the time for finishing and decluttering and not necessarily the time for planting new seeds yet. I wrote about ways to do this in my blog post last month which you can read HERE.

A daily practice

So, if you are still with me by this point in the post and, I haven’t got to woo for you yet! Then you may be interested in how you start to develop a practice of activating this feminine energy.

Helen suggested the need to actively cultivate this mode every day. To drop out of all of the ‘doing’ and into a space where we allow the signs and signals from our hearts to guide us towards a place of purpose and inner knowing. To allow space to listen to our intuition for the more subtle signs and signals of change that want to emerge.

She suggests the morning is crucial. All too often we jump onto our phone 1st thing and boom we are ‘on duty’, we get into ‘getting shit done’ mode and we stay in that mode for the whole day. So how do we keep the phone at bay and create a mindful routine in the morning to cultivate this energy?

In my experience, a great place to start is a morning practice of yoga, walking, meditation, being in the ocean – anything that enables you to just be with your inner-self or in nature. I find this calms down my nervous system and opens up this calmer energy. It’s often when new ideas pop into my head. Have you ever noticed this?

I have also been adding into my practice a moment to pull one of Helen’s cards to actively build the muscle of connecting with my intuition. I take a moment to tune into the message that’s there for me or I ask a question that I want to tune into my intuition to answer. My partner Ben has also got involved and we now both pull cards every day. It’s become a great opportunity to talk about the meaning of the card based on what’s going on for us at that moment.

Activating both masculine and feminine energy

Finally, I wanted to connect the dots on how I am currently using this practice to align both the masculine and feminine energises to have them working together to create sustainable change vs competing against each other…

I have my vision, business plan and goals mapped out – in the masculine domain I have all the logical steps laid out to get there. The ‘container’ is defined but then, I ‘hold them lightly’. I use the daily practice of cultivating the more feminine energy to guide me to lean into my intuition and trust my heart in the daily interactions I am having. Then something slightly unexplained starts to happen…chance meetings or opportunities start to flow in the direction that I want to travel.

I’ve come to realise that if we can align these two energises and value them equally, then we can remain inflow and allow our purpose to start emerging. In my experience, it’s a much more sustainable way to create change that’s at the core of who you are. It also ensures that you are in a good head (and heart) space, giving off good energy, that people are drawn to and attracted to work with.

So, you made it to the end of the post. You survived the ‘woo’ and I urge you to give this a crack (and let me know how you go!) Especially if you are struggling through a transition or change right now and have got stuck in all the logical thinking and doing. Perhaps it could just be time to take a step back and tune into your feminine heart space for some of the answers.

Remember, please feel free to share this post with anyone that you think that might benefit from a different approach right now to creating some much-needed changes.

To your health and happiness,

Clare and the CLARETY Team

P.S. I’m going to be exploring this and other change frameworks in more detail with a very special group in one day retreat that I will be running. So, if you are really ready to make a transition and allow some new projects or things to emerge or, you feel like you have been playing small and now feels right to step into a fuller version of who you are then I would love you to join us. CLICK HERE to request more information.

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